Laugh it Off: 20 Hilarious Grammars Of Patrick Obahiagbon And Their Meaning

Patrick Obahiagbon, who once represented Oredo Federal Constituency of Edo state shot to limelight the moment he arrived the House of Representatives in 2007 with his uncanny knack for jaw-breaking grammars.

If you have ever listened to the honorable member speak before, you will agree with me that you need your dictionary to actually understand his big big grammar….LOL

Here is a compilation of the top 20 Jaw breaking words ever used by the grammarian and their meanings:

1. Crinkum-crankum – Elaborate or detailed (archaic)

2. Megalomania – a mental illness or condition in which somebody has an exaggerated belief in their own importance or power.
3. Jiggery-pokery – Tricky, misrepresentation and manipulation.
4. Mephistophelean – wicked
5. Kakistocracy – Government under the control of a nation’s worst or least-qualified citizens
6. Braggadocio – Boost full or arrogant behavior
7. Ratiocination– The forming of judgment by a process of logical reason
8. Phantasmagoria – a sequence of imaginary images
9. Gargantuan –extremely large
10. Bugaboo – an object of fear
11. Pooh-pooh – Dismiss as being foolish or impractical
12. Insalubrious – unwholesome and unhealthy
13. Odoriferous – having an odor.
14. Lugubrious – mournful, sad, dismal
15. Malodorous – smelling very unpleasant
16. Termagant – a woman who is very strict and who tries to tell people to do things in an unpleasant way
17. Conundrum – A confusing problem or question that is too difficult to solve
18. Alacrit – great willingness or enthusiasm
19. Mendacious – Not telling the truth
20. Egregious – Outstandingly bad and shocking.

WAEC Seized My English Result Twice – Patrick Obahiagbon

Honourable Patrick Obahiagbon  on  an interview with Punch Newspaper..

Punch ­- Did you write exams in school in these big words?
Hourable- I used such words very-very freely in my exams both at the
secondary school and in my university and little wonder I had
the misfortune of my English results being seized intermittently in my O’ Levels.
WAEC released my results for the other subjects and withheld my English result. This happened for
about three years. Twice, I passed the University Matriculation Examination but I
could not proceed to the University because of my English results that…

were not released. At
the end of the day, it was released after the third attempt.

Punch- Why do you always use ‘big grammar’?
Honourable- I am not really consensus ad idem with those who opine that
my idiolect is advertently obfuscative. No no no, it’s just that I am in my elements when
the colloquy has to do with the pax nigeriana of our dreams and one necessarily needs to fulminate against the alcibiadian modus vivendi of our prebendal political class.

Punch- How do you talk to your wife, children and even your friends?
Honourable- I relate with my family and friends very warmly and in an
atmosphere of camaraderie, stripped of my confutational habiliment and gladiatorial
homilies. I am a very peaceful, calm, level-headed and celestially attuned soul personality.

Punch- Is this the way you proposed to your wife, speaking high tech grammar?
Honourable- Of course, the business of the day when I interfaced with my
wife on matters of the heart had to be in plain Caeser’s language
and you can decipher why that had to be so. The matter in view did not permit itself of sphinxian
conundrum.

Punch- Do you know that many people don’t take you too seriously when
you talk because they think you are not communicating?
 Honourable -Why will I be perturbed from ensconcing myself in the
palatable arms of Morpheus because people have deprived themselves of the cultivation of
the regime of the mental magnitude? I read all the farrago of baloneys and vacuous bunkum
from pepper soup objurgators. The spirit of animadversion remains their fundamental
human right. It also remains an indubitable fact that I get millions and millions of requests
daily from people all over the world requesting for my verbal mentorship which positive
cosmopolitan reactions have assisted my equipoise and righteous sense of
pachydermatous garb. I cannot put my nose to the grindstone daily and expect to be
understood by those luxuriating in a modus vivendi, verging on pepper souping, goat heading,
suyaing, big stouting and isiewulising. Has a philosophical wag not once pontificated that
things of the spirit are spiritually discerned and that it takes the deep to call the deep? We will speak more on this matter of critiques and chichi dodo another day.

Punch -Why do you pull your trousers up beyond the waist?
Honourable -Hahahaha….That trousers style is called Yohji Yamamoto. It was my own audacious statement to remonstrate against the pervasive tendency of Nigerians
especially our youths that took to the practice of putting on trousers exposing their lower
anatomical contours and I will do it over and over again
.
Culled from saturday punch

Patrick Obahiagbon Says Calls For Pres. Jonathan To Be Awarded A Nobel Prize Is Laughable

Yesterday the special adviser on new media to president Jonathan,Reno Omokri and many other Nigerians took to social media,saying the president deserves a Noble Peace Prize for averting possible violence in the country,by conceding to Buhari before election results were made public.. Patrick Obahiagbon finds it laughable ..His full tweet reads

These talks of Nobel Prize should be taken for what it is, a jest.. If only they handed it out everytime you did what you are legally bound to do, then everybody would have one…While it is commendable, Let’s not get ahead of ourselves