Our armed forces are immensely flawed. But if we must be honest, this is no befitting way of paying tribute for their enormous sacrifices. Our lives are not too busy for a minute or two of silence and reflection. And it should involve every one of us; young and old, male and female. This remembrance needs to happen in our classrooms, at our offices and in our homes.

The first time I heard about Nigeria’s Armed Forces Remembrance Day, I was 20 years old. It was the second week of January and I was completing an internship at a non-governmental organisation when I noticed that my boss had an unfamiliar accessory pinned to his breast pocket. I concluded he was making a patriotic gesture by wearing it.

The accessory was just a little bigger than a plastic bottle cover. It was like a concentric circle with three layers. The outmost layer was wrapped with a golden lacy material, the middle a blood red colour, and the innermost layer had the Nigerian Coat of Arms, and a bleeding heart that stained the white of the Nigerian flag.

I asked no questions about the accessory. But my lesson came when he asked if I knew what “this thing” he had been wearing all week represented. I didn’t. He told me it was an emblem to commemorate the Armed Forces Remembrance Day.

Two years later, on Nov. 11, 2016, I am at a Remembrance Day ceremony in Canada’s capital, Ottawa, with thousands of other people. The weather is as cold as a refrigerator. The woman standing beside me occasionally breaks into a stationary march to keep warm. People without gloves blow warm air from their mouth into their palms and rub them together. We are at the National War Memorial waiting for the ceremony to start. The entire wait and ceremony lasts almost three hours. This is happening in 1400 communities across Canada.

The Royal Canadian Legion, a community service organisation that advocates for veterans, plans the ceremonies. School children, women and men, old and young, civilian and military personnel attend these ceremonies to pay tribute to those who have offered their lives in service of the country. The ceremonies are organised so Canadians will never forget the sacrifices these people have made and continue to make to keep them safe.

Nigeria’s Armed Forces Remembrance Day falls on January 15 annually. It was formerly marked on November 11, but the date was changed to commemorate the end of the Nigerian Civil War.

Unfortunately, on January 15, not everyone remembers.

Across the country, the Armed Forces Remembrance Day ceremony is a military and politicians’ affair. Most of the public – with the exception of those who follow the news – is oblivious. School children do not know because we have not emphasised the sacrifices of our armed forces in classes about civic education and history. There is also no public holiday that would force us to reflect on the significance of the day. On January 15, only public officers participate in a Remembrance Day ceremony that is not accessible to the public.

Children and even adults spend this day not remembering that thousands of soldiers are in the North-Eastern towns battling Boko Haram, making it possible for us to go to school and enjoy the company of friends without fear. Thousands more are on land and in our waters suppressing threats from people who frequently vow to make our country unsafe.

Many will not remember that these soldiers and military personnel, who are paid meagre salaries, face threats to their lives daily, but still continue to keep us safe and free. We do not remember those who have died serving our country, or the veterans who are now with us nursing injuries – physical and emotional – that were contracted on battlegrounds.

Our armed forces are immensely flawed. But if we must be honest, this is no befitting way of paying tribute for their enormous sacrifices. Our lives are not too busy for a minute or two of silence and reflection. And it should involve every one of us; young and old, male and female. This remembrance needs to happen in our classrooms, at our offices and in our homes. Because how do we remember if we never even think about the sacrifices of some of our country’s heroes?

Halima Olajumoke Sogbesan wrote from Ottawa, Canada.