Perfect Timing: Couple finally ties the knot after dating for 41 years.

If the old saying, love and time are the only things that can’t be bought is true; after dating for 41 years, Bill and Linda Bownds have plenty of both.

After more than four decades, the Woodlands couple celebrated tying the knot with family in Katy.

“I love her and I want to make her happy and I think she respects me,” said Bill Bownds.

His bride, Linda, quickly interjected, “But I love him too.”

Surrounded by the family that brought them together, stories from when they met in 1975 and how it lasted this long are shared.

“Just try to make the other person happy,” said Bill. “Just put the other person first and make it a goal making that other person happy.”

Bill and Linda have always been “together” although they have never lived under the same room. The only secret they kept hidden from their families was their wedding.

“Everybody was in shock,” said Bill.

“It just seemed like the time was right even though it took us a while,” said Linda.

Bill’s 96-year-old mother, Kay, has been waiting for this Christmas for a long time.

“I knew they were meant for each other,” said Kay. “They got along so beautifully and apparently we got them together.”

Congratulations and a warm welcome into the family are scribed into the Bownds’ newest chapter of a four-decade old book.

“We have what’s called impartial love,” said Bill. “We care about each other first I think and that makes a big difference.”

Perhaps the couple will honey moon, in another decade or so.

Japan’s Sex Problem Is So Bad That People Are Quitting Dating & Marrying

The Japanese sex problem has become so desperate that its young population are giving up on dating and are just marrying their friends.

A Government survey found 69 per cent of Japanese men and 59 per cent of Japanese women do not have a romantic partner.

One Japanese aggregator website has since been awash with stories of how people have simply got married to life-long friends.

The country has one of the lowest birth rates in the world, with just 8.4 children being born per 1,000 inhabitants over the last five years.

Its population of 127m people is predicted to decrease to 87m by 2060.

The survey, carried out by the country’s National Institute of Population and Social Security Research, also reported that about 80 per cent of unmarried Japanese want to get married.

In recent weeks, people have posted stories to the aggregator website Matome Naver, telling how in one case, a colleague married their friend of 10 years.

The trend has been coined “Kousai zero Nichikon”: roughly translated as “marrying without dating”.

Japanese actress Maki Horikita married co-star Koji Yamamoto in 2015 after just a month of dating.

Read More: businessinsider

5 Questions To Ask That Divorced Guy You’re Dating

Are you comfortable talking about your divorce?

A man who completely avoids the topic or shows “significant discomfort” talking about his divorce may still be emotionally invested or, at the very least, has some serious tension about the topic, Cilona says. And that’s a red flag. It shows that he has an unhealthy connection to his previous marriage and/or spouse, which could be trouble for your future.

Do you want to get married again?

You might assume that since he’s been married before, he wouldn’t have any issues hitching up again, but as Durvasula points out, that’s not always the case. “Some may not want to get married again after experiencing it once,” she says. It’s important to determine where your guy stands on the issue, and how it aligns with where you see your future going.

Do you believe that you can spend your life with someone?

Even if neither of you is interested in marriage, it’s a good idea to find out whether he thinks two people can be together for the long haul—ring or no ring. Think: Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. He may not want to legally commit again, but could be completely open to the idea of a forever-commitment or living together. “Plenty of divorced folks believe in love and commitment as much as anyone,” Durvasula says. If your guy no longer thinks that two people can be in a loving, committed relationship, that’s a red flag.

Did you want the divorce?

According to Stanford University research, 70 percent of divorces are initiated by women. And, while your guy may not have initiated the divorce, it’s good to find out if he wanted it. “You want to suss out that he is not still pining for his old life,” Durvasula says. “You also want to find out if he is still holding a torch for his ex.” Granted, it’s possible he didn’t want the divorce but he’s since moved on. However, his answer to the question can provide clues as to whether that’s the case.

How do you feel about your ex?

Not everyone can speak highly about their ex (kudos to Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck), but if he’s super bitter or angry about her, that could be a sign that he’s still emotionally invested in the relationship, Durvasula says.

Other bad signs: Your guy puts the blame for the demise of his marriage on his ex, or says he’s learned gross generalized lessons about women or marriage based on his experience, Cilona says. “No matter what the situation, each partner has accountability and contributes in some ways to the relationship and dissolution of the marriage,” he points out.

Above all, keep this in mind: Divorce can be a very healthy thing. “Staying in a broken relationship is not honorable, and many people grow from them,” Durvasula says. “But you do need to ask these questions to decide if you would be OK with being spouse number two if it came down to that.”

Credit: womenshealthmag

School Prohibits Students From Dating In Order To Prevent Teenage Pregnancy

Golden Heritage Polytechnic College in Cagayan de Oro City, Philippines, has instituted a “true love waits” policy that forbids students from having romantic relationships with people of the opposite sex while they are enrolled. As ABS-CBN news explains, this is to prevent teen pregnancies so more students can finish their education.

According to a big yellow banner hanging outside the school, “[a] love affair will surely destroy the life of a young lady student therefore this institution prohibit intimate relationship between a male & female students.” Bonus: It’s also printed on teacher’s uniforms.

It’s unclear if this rule specifically targets female students or if it’s universally enforced, though the phrasing here would suggest it’s just the “young lady students” who are considered at risk. It’s also unclear if this applies just to relationships between students or any romantic relationship a student has, even if it’s with someone outside the college.

Read More: Cosmopolitan

5 Signs You Are Dating A Liar

1. A noticeable change in regular behavior

Although we’d like to think our loved ones couldn’t fool us, that’s not always the case. On the flip side, though, if you do know someone well, there’s a better chance you’ll be able to detect if he or she is lying. Ask Men says, “If she’s usually animated and a fast talker, but today she’s sitting with her arms crossed and speaking slowly, maybe there’s something you don’t know. If she rarely looks people in the eye and now she’s practically drilling your pupils with her stare, you may want to get the truth out of her.” When a person is lying, their behavior can be irregular, as they might be nervous, feeling guilty, or crafting the lie as they go. If your sweetie is acting off, something might be up.

2. Your partner has something to gain by acting against your interest

In a Psychology Today article, Marty Nemko, PhD discusses how you can tell who you can and cannot trust. “More important, I’d want to see if a person acts justly even when it’s inexpedient,” Nemko says. “This is especially key if the person has much to gain by acting against your interest and you’re unlikely to detect it.” In his example, Nemko recalls an experience he had in his own life in which his dentist recommended getting a crown. Suspicious, Nemko sought a second opinion. This dentist advised him that his tooth was fine and he hasn’t had any issues with his teeth. The point is the first dentist was being untruthful in order to benefit his business. Similarly, if your partner tries to convince you of something that doesn’t have your best interest in mind, yet presents a significant gain for him or her, you should be wary.

3. Verbal dodging

In her TED Talk, How to Spot a Liar, Pamela Meyer, author of Liespotting, delivers insightful tips on how to recognize deception. She explains verbal dodging is when a person uses formal language, rather than contractions, as well as distancing terms and phrases. Meyer uses Bill Clinton as an example, pointing out his choice of language as he denies his affair with infamous White House intern, Monica Lewinsky. In his claim, Clinton said, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman … Miss Lewinsky.” The takeaway here, Meyer says, is Clinton’s use of “did not,” rather than a less formal contraction, and “that woman,” rather than a reference that seems more familiar. If you’re trying to detect whether or not your partner isn’t being truthful, pay special attention to his or her language.

4. Withholding important information

When you’re seeking the truth, you want your partner to divulge important information that adds up. In an article for Inner Self, Dr. Riki Robbins, PhD, discusses the four stages of trust, one of which is damaged trust. Robbins says it’s in this stage that the people you love will violate your trust, and a common warning sign is withholding vital information. If you ask your partner where he or she was last night, you should expect an honest, straight-forward answer. If he or she responds with, “Nowhere special,” your partner might be hiding something.

5. A radical change in voice

When you spend enough time with someone, you get to know their behavior, mannerisms, and quirks pretty well, which means it’s easy recognize times they stray from such normalcy. In a Real Simple article, Gregg McCrary, retired FBI criminal profiler and crime analyst, said he first tries to assess how someone normally speaks. “Once I know which type of talker a person is, I start asking him questions that I don’t know the answer to. If his manner shifts abruptly — going from calm to agitated or lively to mellow — chances are he’s not telling the truth,” McCrary says. Because you’re already familiar with how your partner speaks and acts, be cautious when his or her delivery feels off.


Kendall Jenner Is Officially Dating A Rapper Too

First there were romance rumors with Nick Jonas, then dating murmurs with Harry Styles and Jordan Clarkson. But Kendall Jenner is now, as Selena Gomez told the press months before, officially off the market. Kendall is “full-on dating” 27-year-old rapper A$AP Rocky, Us Weekly reports.

Kendall and Rocky have been spotted hanging together since February. Rocky was even photographed with her and the fam during Kanye West’s Fashion Week show that month.

“They’re both major players,” a source told the outlet (though whether they meant players in love or just in their industries wasn’t specified.) “They have lots to talk about.”

Rocky most recently went with Kendall to her sister Kylie’s 19th birthday party last week. Us Weekly notes the couple “acted affectionate” and snuck out the back door together, the mark of true Hollywood love.

Read More: cosmopolitan

Dear Ladies, Stop Dating Men Who Want To ‘Fix You’

Men love to fix things. It probably has a lot to do with the toys they played with when they were little boys. Boy toys are things like Lincoln Logs, or plastic tool belts, or train tracks that come in pieces to be put together and taken apart and put back together in a new way, whenever they want. Girls can play with these toys too, but most of them are marketed towards boys, who are taught early on that it’s an admirable and masculine quality to be able to fix things with your own hands.

A lot of those boys grow up and become men who forget about fixing things and become bankers or writers instead. Some love fixing things so much that they grow up and become construction workers, or handymen. And others – and this is the worst option — decide they want to move onto something new, and fix women. This is the Fix You guy, and you’ve probably dated him.

Fix You guy is everywhere. One of the most famous ones I can think of is Paul the writer, who falls in love with the beautiful but deeply tragic Holly Golightly in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Another isAidan from Sex and the City, who pushes Carrie to improve her apartment and make it better, but only after buying it and becoming her legal landlord. The most recent example of the Fix You guy is Gus (Paul Rust) in the new Netflix series, Love.

The Fix You guy usually shows up right after you’ve been through a breakup, or when you’re feeling really sad about wintertime, or when you’re — for whatever reason, really — just feeling a little low. For example, in Love, Gus shows up right after Mickey’s gone through a breakup with a shitty ex, and has just wrecked a year and a half of sobriety. Maybe the thinking is that the Fix You guy wouldn’t be able to date hot women if they didn’t have any problems. Or maybe it’s that we’ve seen so many damsels in distress as love objects that there’s an internalized notion that makes Fix You guys think the most fucked up girl in the room is the best girl in the room. If she’s a damsel in distress, and he can help her, does that make him a prince?

The trickiest thing about the Fix You guy is that he presents as someone who loves women, who is drowning in empathy and will listen to all of your problems, and promise to make things better. But Fix You guy has his own blueprint. He wants to fix you, but really he just needs to feel important. He’ll stick around as long as things aren’t going well for him, and as long as he feels you’re something to improve. It’s not about making you better, it’s about making you better for his needs. He gets off on your personal traumas and the power he feels when he offers advice that doesn’t fit. It doesn’t so much matter if Fix You guy is actually helping. It only matters that he feels like he is.

Fix You guy looks like Nice Guy in a lot of ways. He’s nerdy. He comes across as smart and intellectual, and he’s read more books than he’s played sports, but he’s not ashamed of that. Maybe it used to bug him that he was smaller than the other guys, but now he’s proud to have avoided such a masculine ritual. This doesn’t make sense as you get to know him, but Fix You guy abhors the patriarchy. He had a pretty easy childhood — no traumas or problems, his parents are still together, no major deaths or anything that landed him in therapy as a teenager — and that’s why he’s qualified to fix you. He knows what it means to be healthy and good because he is healthy and good, and you are not. You are fucked up, he’s here to tell you, but don’t worry. He can fix you.

Even if you do come to the slow realization that this guy is not Nice Guy, it’s incredibly hard to leave Fix You guy. Usually because you didn’t know you needed to be “fixed” until you met him. He helps you identify all these problems you didn’t know you had, but calls them areas of improvement, or ways you can grow. He makes you believe you can be a better person with his help. He listens to you talk about your problems. He takes those on as his own, but not in an empathetic way. This is more like stealing your traumas. Usually, Fix You guy wants to be an artist, and to make good art, he believes one must suffer. If he can’t suffer, he’ll surround himself with women who have. He will jerk off to your heartbreak and hold your head when you cry.

But Fix You guy can’t stand to watch you make good choices. He needs you to need him. If you can excel on your own, where does he fit in? This is all about his power, remember?  He needs to be in control of something to feel good about himself, like Tinker Toys but with human feelings.

If Gus were the Nice Guy, he would’ve listened to Mickey when she said she needed some time apart. Mickey isn’t perfect — she clearly has her own problems. Watching her spiral out and stalk Gus’s Facebook when he won’t text back, watching her frantically search for her missing cat, watching her try to find literally anything that can make her feel like she’s not failing, is so hard because that’s what happens when the nice Fix You guy leaves when he feels unneeded. Fix You guys do not repair your problems, they create more. And they don’t care.

Here’s the other thing about Fix You guy. He does’t know — he doesn’t care — that people can’t fix each other. Wanting to fix people implies that some are broken, and he’s been given an invisible toy tool belt that no one else has. Don’t date this guy, don’t date the Guses you meet, who seem great but only when you’re feeling like shit. As long as you’re with someone who’s trying to fix you you’ll only ever feel broken. And you’re not. People don’t break that way.

Credit: Cosmopolitan

Ok! Tyga Has Something To Say About Blac Chyna Dating A Kardashian

It’s been hard for some to process the news that Rob Kardashian is dating Blac Chyna, the ex of Rob’s sister’s current boyfriend Tyga. Most of the attention so far has been focused on how the Kardashians are reacting to their relationship. But what about Tyga? What does he think of this whole thing?

According to E! Online , when cameras caught up to him, he was surprisingly Zen about the big news. A cameraman asked him if he was “cool with Rob dating Chyna,” and Tyga had a very simple response.

On Thursday, TMZ reported that Rob may have moved in with her after Khloé Kardashian caught them partying in her house. That same day, Rob went back to working out at the gym, posting a new photo on Instagram. Hey, he’s got to stay in shape for his new lady.

Credit: Cosmopolitan

I Can’t Say If I’m Dating Freda Francis – Iyanya

Iyanya, has opened up on being‘sexually’ harassed by some of his female fans.Speaking recently with DZRPT TV’s Breakfast Club,he said:

Yes, female fans these days are so daring.I have seen couple of great boobs and other nice things. I have mad female fans who harass me sexually and what almost all of them actually want is just my body and not my money,”

On dating Freda Francis, he said,

“Well, I can’t say whether I am in a relationship with Freda or not because I don’t want to get myself into trouble.“If I answer this question here now, I will have many more questions to answer, so I better wave it. Besides my fans are more concerned about my music and when my next album is dropping and not who I am dating.”

Kim K Reveals Kanye’s Strict Set Of Dating Rules

We all know Kanye looks like a hard nut to crack, but didn’t know he actually applied it to his relationship .Kim Kardashian has revealed Kanye West set some strict rules when they first started dating.
Kanye, who didn’t have a phone for four years, banned mobiles from meals out.Speaking in a Q&A session with Paper magazine,Kim said:

“When we first started dating it was rude if we brought our phones with us out, so l learned from him not to bring my phone.”

 She also said that at their wedding they asked people not to bring their phones so they could be “enjoy the moment”

.During our wedding we asked that everyone – not for privacy reasons but just for everyone to live and enjoy the moment – to leave our phones and everyone called us afterwards and said it was the best thing they’ve ever done.

She also said that they would spend half their time at dinner taking pictures, but now they’ve put a stop to that.We have rules at the table. If we are eating at a restaurant, we’ll wait to do it (take pictures) when we are done eating.”
Kim continued:

“He’s taught me to take a little time for myself and I’ve taught him stop a little more to take time and take pictures and stuff.”

Blake Shelton & Gwen Stefani Are Definitely Dating — Her Rep Confirms

It’s official! Blake Shelton and Gwen Stefani are totally dating, ya’ll. Her rep confirmed the news on Nov. 4, saying they wanted to reveal the new relationship as they celebrate the Country Music Awards in Nashville tonight. Find out all the details here!

Look away, Miranda Lambert. Blake Shelton, 39, and Gwen Stefani, 46, have just confirmed they’re dating, via her rep — only days after photos from their PDA-filled Halloween weekend surfaced online.

“Gwen and Blake are longtime friends who have very recently started dating,” Gwen’s rep told Us Weekly. The rep also told TMZ that Gwen and Blake wanted to reveal their relationship tonight, Nov. 4, as they celebrate the CMAs in Nashville. They’ll be “attending several after-parties following the awards ceremony,” a source told the news site. As for how long they’ve been dating, Gwen’s rep said, “just days.” 


Apparently, Gwen made a last minute decision to fly to Nashville to be by Blake’s side for the awards show, however, she won’t attend the actual ceremony. She’ll only join him for the after parties. And TMZ’s source said it has nothing to do with potentially running into Blake’s ex, Miranda Lambert. “She doesn’t care if Miranda’s there or not. She just didn’t have the right clothes for the award ceremony because it was so last minute,” the source said. has reached out to Gwen and Blake’s reps for our own comment.

As previously reported, a source EXCLUSIVELY told us, “They are treading water, but it is blossoming into something real. They laughed off the rumors, they fought off the rumors, and then by doing that, it has now turned into something real. It is far from anything along the lines of getting married again, having their own children and all that, but they are just finally realizing that they get along very well with each other. They have similar interests and also have similar heartaches. The rumors brought them together and it is becoming something more than they ever thought it would become!” So cute.

Kourtney Kardashian Already Dating Someone New?

Kourtney Kardashian was spotted looking sizzling hot in an all black piece, usual black mane and a hand dragging her.

Surprisingly, she captioned “She’s all mine”… and that has got us thinking is she has buried the hopes of a Scott Disick comeback and starting afresh with someone new.

See IG post below:

Drake? No Please… See Who Serena Williams Is Dating

Serena Williams is dating Reddit co-founder Alexis Ohanian. “They met at a lunch,” a source reveals in the new issue of Us Weekly. “It’s new.”

Although Williams, 34, was recently linked to Drake, a second source says it was simply a “flirty friendship.” Now, the tennis pro is making love part of her routine, bringing her new guy, 32, to her workout at the Los Angeles School of Gymnastics on Saturday, Oct. 24. Says an onlooker, “He called her babe and they held hands.”

Ohanian has even been getting into her sport of choice. Says the source, “He said he’d never been into tennis until they started dating!”

Serena Williams Is Dating Alexis Ohanian, the Co-Founder of Reddit

Credit: USweekly

Serena Williams And Drake Deny Engagement Rumors

While we all  that Serena Williams and Drake have been dating, OK Magazine started a whole new round of celeb gossip on Thursday with the news that the two were now engaged. Even though no confirmation was given for the tabloid report, social media went crazy about the rumor and started to announce the couple’s supposed engagement.

Ok Mag said Drake got down on one knee and proposed
They added:

‘She said yes but they want to keep it on the down-low for now.

‘Now that Drake has her, he isn’t letting her go,’ 

However the rep said that no such proposal took place.

‘The rumour is completely untrue.’

Scott Disick Buries Relationship With Kourtney Kardashian? Dating 18-Year-Old

Scott Disick has been spotted out and about schmoozing a new ladyfriend following his split from Kourtney Kardashian earlier this year.

No less than an 18-year-old ladyfriend, in fact.

The self-proclaimed Lord Disick was pictured relaxing on a sun lounger with a very young Lindsay Vrckovnik laying on top of him.

32-year-old Scott was pictured with the recent school graduate the morning after they had been sighted out partying until 6 am.

Read More: yahoo

Beckham Reportedly Dating Amber Rose

According to TMZ Sports, Odell Beckham Jr. is dating Amber Rose. If you remember, the two were connected thanks to a really weird rumor that got started earlier this summer, and OBJ fought hard to clear his name with regards to it.


But despite that, sources have told TMZ Sports that “Beckham began pursuing Rose a few months ago” and that the two are now a thing. It doesn’t sound like it’s gotten too serious yet, but a handful of people on Twitter reported seeing them together recently in New York City.

Read More: Complex

I Have Not Been Approached, Caitlyn Jenner Opens Up On Dating

In the latest episode of “I Am Cait,” Caitlyn Jenneropens up about her future and if that includes dating.

“It’s been, like, a month or two now that I’ve been out,” she said at the time of taping for Sunday night’s episode. “So I honestly haven’t even thought or been approached or been tempted in any direction,” she added according to People magazine’s recap.

Read MoreGoodMorningAmerica

Caitlyn Jenner Ready To Date Men, Says She Wants A Guy To Treat Her Like A Woman

Caitlyn Jenner has hinted she may date men.In a new episode of I Am Cait  ,she admits to friend and transgender activist Jennifer Finney Boylan that she could be attracted to men. She says in the clip, obtained by People magazine. “

It would be very attractive to me to have a guy treat me like a woman,”That you would be treated like a normal woman. Like any other woman in the street and not make it this trans-[gender] thing, “Just a normal relationship.”

Worried Caitlyn believes a man is needed, Boylan then insisted she is a normal woman and doesn’t
need a man for that to happen.

“A woman can make you a woman,It’s a thing we women do. We look to men to give us self worth.”Now that you’re in the sisterhood, you have gone to such trouble to be a woman; don’t be a stupid one. Be a smart one.

#VirgoSeason: Things You Should Know Before Dating a Virgo

1. We’re practically perfect in every way.

Ok, not strictly true. But this is our attainable life goal so any praise and encouragement in that direction will always be welcomed, thank you.

2. We like clean surroundings.

So take it as a compliment that we’re in a relationship with you. Hey! You’re not unhygienic and disgusting! Make sure it stays that way.

3. We’re analytical.

Not saying we MASSIVELY over-think things but if you come shopping with us and we have to make a decision between a black-fringed tote and a beige-fringed tote, don’t expect it to involve any less time and consideration than say, a global peace process talk.

4. We can be quite hard on ourselves.

Not sure what’s worse: the fact that we genuinely aren’t just fishing for compliments, or that we really are this self-critical.

5. We’re sensitive souls.

Probably best not to watch Comic Relief with a Virgo. You’ll only end up spending a night in sat next to a sobbing maniac who’s just emptied her entire bank account texting YES to 70010.

6. We like attention to detail.

Yeah, to YOU it seems like a waste of time spending twenty-five minutes proofreading one Facebook status. But to us it’s a thoroughly enjoyable way to ensure a distinct lack of grammar-related public embarrassment.

7. We’re loyal and devoted. 

And therefore the best friend you could ever hope for – unless someone crosses us: we will end you.

8. We’re fussy and judgemental.

People have to understand that no matter how well they do something (make a cuppa, organise a holiday, paint a room, hey, even open a door) we will always be safe in the knowledge we could have done it better.

9. We’re fairly similar to Dumbledore.

Not in the beard stakes, thank Christ. But when you take a quick look at our impressive ‘pearls of wisdom per words spoken’ ratio, you’ll see what we mean. You can take that as proof we’re ALWAYS RIGHT.


Signs You Are Dating A Mama’s Boy


A major part of adulthood is being able to think for yourself. If your man has a problem with this, you’re in trouble. When his thoughts are always derived from how his mama feels, you’re not dating him, you’re dating his mom. A man who is always doing what his mother says can torpedo a relationship real fast. What if she ends up not liking you? Do you think he will stay with you, or rather, leave because of her influence? Also, if his mama tells him every move to make, it can condition him to be a lazy thinker so you may end up being the voice of reason for everything in her absence. Sounds exhausting, doesn’t it?


Listen, this one should be a no-brainer, but if it still hasn’t clicked for you, allow me to break it down. He’s a grown man who doesn’t have his own address. Sure, he may pay a bill or two, but this man has no idea what it means to live on his own, do his own grocery shopping, or even how to budget. If you settle down with this mama’s boy, just know that he will probably end up moving in with you too.


While you may find this endearing in the beginning, I can assure you that this will become “played out” very fast. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a man checking in with his mama. But if their phone conversations average an hour each day, it’s safe to say there’s an abnormal amount of influence from her in regards to his life.

If you’re already caught up with a mama’s boy and you’re not happy with the relationship, the best thing to do is to put your foot down and demand that some things change. But don’t be too pushy if you really want to hold onto this mama’s boy. Remember, she was there first, and because he’s codependent, old habits do die hard. Patience is key, but only you know how much you can take. If this is something that you don’t think you can handle, it may be time to move on.


Dating Your Co- Worker? Can It Lead To Marriage? Read This

We didn’t meet on the job — we were dating for almost four years before we started working together (which, by the way, wasn’t planned … long story). But for about 11 months, we sat three cubes apart from one another and kept our relationship under wraps.

That’s right: Nobody knew we were a couple. “Nobody knew?!” “Wasn’t it hard to hide?” “Isn’t that illegal?”

Those are questions I’m frequently asked when I tell people the story of my office romance.

My answer to all three: “Nope — because we followed the rules.”

1. Take it slow.

My situation was unique because we were already a couple before we started working together — but generally that isn’t the case, and Lynn Taylor, a national workplace expert and the author of “Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job,” suggests you try being friends in-and-outside the office before you make any moves.

People sometimes act differently at work than they do in their personal life. Before you risk hurting your reputation at work, find out if this person is someone you’d want to spend weekends with.

2. Keep things quiet early on.

No need to send a blast email with “the news” of you and your cube-mate’s new relationship. People either don’t care, will think it’s obnoxious or inappropriate, or will get jealous.

“Be discreet about the news,” Taylor suggests. Once you have a sense that this might have a future, talk to your partner and decide how and when you want to disclose your relationships to your colleagues.

If the rumor mill goes into high gear, that might be the right time. If nobody seems to notice, there’s no reason to share.

3. Get on the same page.

You and your new partner need to agree on some ground rules and come up with a plan for how you will keep it professional and stay within written or unwritten rules. “What will be your plan ‘B’ if the heat is on from a supervisor, from gossip, or if things go awry?” Taylor asks.

4. Stay professional at all times.

“You may have the burden of overcompensating with professionalism and keeping an artificial distance, which can be an awkward strain,” says Taylor. “Better to overcompensate than to constantly test the limits of workplace etiquette while hoping for the best.”

5. Be sensitive and respectful to others.

Focus on work and do your job — especially if you want to mitigate gossip.

“No one wants to hear about how deeply you’re in love with each other or where you went last weekend or the fight you had in the car this morning,” she explains. “Save it for your family or friends outside work.”

Talking about the relationship can be distracting or make colleagues feel uncomfortable, so don’t do it.

6. Keep love quarrels out of the work fray.

Again — nobody wants or needs to know about what’s happening with your love life.

“It’s hard enough today to concentrate with open office spaces, a plethora of technology devices, frantic deadlines, multiple bosses, and so on,” says Taylor. “Add to that two lovers fighting over doing dishes in the next cube and you have one unhappy coworker, who you may catch sauntering to HR.”

Also, it’s entirely unprofessional to complain about your personal relationships at work, whether you’re dating a colleague or not.

7. Don’t let disagreements affect your work.

This may be one of the hardest rules to follow.

What happens at home or in your personal life (no matter who you’re dating) almost always affects your attitudes, which impacts your work — it’s just a fact of life.

But try your hardest not to let your disagreements with your partner affect the decisions you make or how your treat others at work.

8. Remain focused on your work.

“Spend your time as if you are not dating this person,” advises Taylor. Don’t get caught up in long conversations, two-hour lunches, IMing, or emailing with your partner when you should be working on projects or preparing for meetings.

9. Know the formal policy.

Check the company handbook to find out if there are any policies related to interoffice relationships.

Even if there are no explicit policies against it, find out how upper management feels about office romances. If they’re common and happen in your workplace all the time, great. If not, maybe that’s something to consider.

10. Know the potential legal pitfalls.

“Employees are generally encouraged to report incidents of sexual harassment or events that create a hostile work environment,” says Taylor. “Since the sensitivities of the workforce are varied and subjective, there’s always a risk of offending someone. One complaint to HR for PDA, showing preferential treatment, or using words of endearment in public will at the very least trigger an investigation.”

11. Go easy on flirtatious texts and emails.

“Be careful what you text or email to each other, not just because Steve in accounting might fall off his chair when he mistakenly receives it — but also because it could ultimately be used as evidence in a legal case in termination or sexual harassment,” she warns.

12. Consider what you’d want to do if things do work out.

As a relationship becomes more serious, oftentimes one person will decide to leave the employer completely, because the more involved you are, the greater likelihood of the relationship interfering with your job. “That’s why so many companies have policies against nepotism, which applies to married couples and relatives,” says Taylor. This is something to think about early on and to keep in mind as you move forward in the relationship.

“The bottom line is, you need to tread carefully,” she adds. “If, however, love happens to strike at work, don’t make a concerted effort to fight it at any cost. Just know the risks.”

Your decision not only affects you, but other person, both your careers, and those around you. “A word to the wise: If you take the leap, go into it with your eyes wide open,” Taylor concludes.


Caitlyn Jenner Dating Transgender Actress? (PHOTO)

Caitlyn Jenner has been going form strength-to-strength since making her debut on the cover of Vanity Fair in June, and now reports are claiming she may have found herself a partner in the form of Candis Cayne.

The 65-year-old allegedly instantly hit it off with the transgender actress in New York, where she attended a Gay Pride event, before the two spent a few more days together.

According to reports, the two went shopping, had a candlelit dinner, watched a show on Broadway and went to a spa together.

If only all our dates were like that.


A source allegedly told Star Magazine: “Caitlyn and Candis had amazing chemistry. After her monumental life change, Caitlyn’s ready to open up her heart again and really, how could you ask for a more perfect fit as a romantic partner than Candis?

“She’s been basically through the same struggles and confusion, so she’d be the perfect person for Caitlyn to lean on as she continues her journey of transition.

“Candis is smart, funny, talented and drop-dead sexy. I wouldn’t blame Caitlyn one bit if she fell for her.”

However, before we get too excited about Cait seemingly taking the next step in her journey, a source has since denied the claims to Gossip Cop.

They said: “It’s wishful thinking on [Star’s] part.”


Nigerian Poses As Royal Marine, Dupes Four Women Of N30m

*Four women who were duped out of £100,000 by lonely hearts conman on dating website after he posed as a Royal Marine will only get a few hundred pounds back each

*The victims paid money to Nigerian immigrant Adewale Adewole, 31
*He posed as a Royal Marine commando on the dating website
*Falsely claimed to be army captain Timmy Francis who ran an orphanage
*Duped women into sending him money which he transferred to his wife
Four besotted women duped out of almost £100,000 by a lonely hearts conman posing as a Marine commando will be paid back just a few hundred pounds each after a police auction of his luxury

Nigerian immigrant Adewale Adewole, 31, posed as Royal Marine commando Timmy Francis on the dating website
He falsely claimed to run an orphanage in Africa and was looking for romance under the motto: ‘To live and love’ and the online nickname ‘Charismatic Brit’.

But after charming the unsuspecting women, he then claimed he needed money saying he had been mugged while attending to his ‘orphanage’.
The women all sent him cash and paid his hotel bills – only for him to transfer the money into the bank account of his wife who shared his home with their two children in Eccles, Greater Manchester.

Police who caught up with father-of-three Adewole discovered he had used the women’s cash to splash out on iPads, TVs and designer clothes plus electronic and musical items such as a glitterball and a keyboard thought to be worth in total tens of thousands of pounds.
But after he was jailed for four years, officers auctioned off the confiscated items in a bid to repay the victims – only for it to yield just £2,000.
It means the women will get back only hundreds of pounds each – with one victim getting just £199.

It is not known what happened to £4,500 in cash which Adewole kept under his bed and insisted was his.

At a proceeds of crime hearing at Manchester Crown Court, prosecutor Miss Louise Brandon said: ‘The value of the loss was £98,140 and from that there is an available amount of £2,213.71 but the prosecution have four complainants who lost considerable amounts of money.
‘The available items were mainly electrical that the police auctioned off so it would mean getting that money from the auction. The compensation orders have been reached proportionally but unfortunately it is no where near what they did give but it is all we can get. The complainants are fully aware that it was unlikely they would get it back.’

At an earlier court hearing Miss Brandon said the four victims were registered with and did not know each other.

She added: ‘They were all contacted on the dating site by a man called Timmy Francis who had two profiles under the mottos ‘To Live and Love’ and ‘Charismatic Brit’. They had contact with him during the period the fraud took place via text message, phone and email.
‘He told them he had been a captain in the army. He also said he ran an orphanage in Africa called the Hope House Foundation, for which he set up a website including own mobile phone number.

‘There was a profile picture on his Match accounts and he sent some of the women photographs of himself – all of these pictures were actually of a Royal Marine Commander called Joshua McGowan who knew nothing of what was going on.

‘Each of the women wanted to find out more about him and were led to believe they were in a relationship with him. Although they arranged to meet, he never kept to the arrangements and never did meet any of the victims.

Miss Brandon added: ‘He told the women that on a trip to Africa he was the victim of a crime and needed money. The crime meant he could not access his own funds. He said they would get their money back and would be sent letters from the World Health Organisation to show that he would be able to pay them.

‘These letters were sent, but from an M30 Manchester postmark. He also sent them links to websites which, when logging in with details he gave them, appeared to show that he had a huge bank balance and would eventually be able to pay them back.

‘One woman was asked to pay for a hotel for him. When she rang the number he gave her for the hotel, they also confirmed the information and she agreed to pay it. She later received a cheque addressed to him for £35,000 to prove he had money, but this was later discovered to be a stolen cheque forged in his own handwriting.

‘Over a number of months each woman transferred significant sums of money via bank accounts and Western Union moneygrams and sent items to the defendant’s home address. They bought electronic items, took out credit cards and loans and bought clothes from Next. Many of the goods were sent to his home address in Eccles from where the victims believed they would be forwarded on to the defendant in Nigeria.
‘When the women stopped sending money they never heard from him again.’

The court heard the total amount stolen including the value of the household goods and Western Union transfers was £98,140.
Adewole was arrested in October 2012 at his flat and £4,500 in cash was found under his bed. A digital camera was found purchased by one of the victims, but containing pictures of the defendant and his wife and children. Designer clothes and shoes were also found worth £2,000 alone.
Adewole’s wallet was also seized and contained several SIM cards, some of which contained the phone numbers of the victims. His two Blackberry phones were also seized – on these three different email accounts were in use which were linked to the two Match accounts. He was bailed and later tried to call one of the woman again under the name Timmy Francis and was arrested again.

When questioned he claimed to know nothing of the orphanage but that the £4,500 was his. He said the majority of the items found in his flat were to go to his mother in Nigeria. He admitted he had used in 2010, 2011 and 2012 but could not remember when exactly.
The victims known only as Miss E, Miss A, Miss W and Miss H will get back just £863.38, £332.07, £199.26 and £819.10 respectively.

Defence counsel Mr Khadim Al’Hassan said: ‘I’m surprised by the amount from the auctions, it must have been a really bad day because they were all new items.’

Seven Steps to Finding True Love

Step 1: Envision your ideal mate
You’ve got to know what it is you want before you “put it out there to the universe,” so spend some time honestly evaluating your marriage, past relationships and any crushes you may have had along the way. This will help you figure out the must-have qualities in a good partner for you. “Writing those traits down helps keep you focused,” says Harrell. “State clearly what you do want (“He/She is loyal”), not what you don’t (“My partner won’t cheat”).

Step 2: Tackle your own insecurities about dating and relationships
If you try to meet someone great while you’re still grappling with self-doubt, any minor setback could be interpreted as further “proof” that you’re not cut out for dating. But by taking responsibility for whatever emotional work you still need to do after the end of a relationship, you’re able to experience each new person on his or her own merits. This is much better than unrealistically expecting a new partner to “fix” what’s missing in your life.

Step 3: Focus only on the good things after each date
Not every attempt at romance is going to work out, but you can put even the worst dates to work for you in a positive way. “At least 90% of the time, you can say at least one positive thing about a date… find something that you liked about it,” says Lori Gorshow, a dating coach. “Maybe she had amazing eyes or you like how he really listened. Use that information to better know what you’re looking for in a long-term partner.”

Step 4: Convince yourself that you’re worthy of lasting love
Of course, finding the right person won’t do much good if you don’t believe you’re worthy of having him or her as your eventual spouse. You can break those old self-doubting habits by creating a personal mantra worth repeating to yourself regularly. Your affirmation can be anything you say to yourself in the present tense that’s simple, concise, and positive (think: “I have a healthy, loving relationship,” or “I’m a beautiful person worth loving”).

Step 5: Be picky about the people whom you choose to date
Your list of “must-haves” may seem like it’s decimating your field of potential mates, but really, it’s only weeding out the misfires. “When people are hurt, they sometimes think they have to take advantage of any opportunity available,” says Gorshow. “But at a certain point, you’re just wasting your own time.” A dating checklist empowers you to screen for red flags and move on when you see them instead of spending more time on each person “just in case” there’s potential.

Step 6: Let your positive self-image shine through on dates
A good attitude isn’t just the key to finding more dates — demonstrating the right outlook can also ensure you keep other quality singles interested in taking things to the next level. “People are generally more attracted to someone with a positive attitude than a negative person,” says Harrell. So when you’re out with a new love interest, be sure to talk about the things you truly love and that make you light up (i.e., your favorite hobbies, a trip you took recently with friends) rather than dwelling on unpleasant subjects (like why you’re still single, or how rude your waiter is being to you both tonight).

Step 7: Have an outlet for dealing with day-to-day stress
You’ll stay more positive about dating when you are able to keep your life’s everyday stressors in perspective. “Have a routine that helps you deal with stress, whether it’s exercise, sports, spa treatments, or mantras,” advises Riche. “Find something that feeds your soul and quiets your mind and do it regularly, not just when there’s something stressful going on.”