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#PAUSIBILITY: Nigeria, Whirlpool of Executive Scoundrels and The Change That May Never Come by Adebayo Coker


I made a New Year resolution to try as much as possible not to burden myself with anything that may cause grief in whatever guise but my beloved nation wouldn’t stop throwing lumps of it my path. If you notice this will be my first post this year. I have tried to evade the many punches but I just couldn’t help it no more. Especially when Na’lie arrogantly implied to Seun Okinbaloye of Politics Today on Channels TV last Sunday, 7th February, 2016, that Nigerians will accept his gagging bill, willy-nilly.

Happy New Year!

The other day when some wise men rose up from their Ibadan Summit and issued a communiqué of a perfunctory exit to ‘Fulani herdsmen’ I knew their wisdom was already perforated by that singular anserine show. I was in no way disappointed when a notable one amongst the demagogic elders was on the list of beneficiaries of Santa Dasuki. I thought further: maybe those kidnappers were boys that came to get some trifling after they got to know that Baba has jola Aso Rock falala falala and refused to appease the land that he has desecrated; most of the so-called statesmen chameleoning as Awoists, Zikists, Balewaists to fleece us of our commonwealth are nothing but useless men that are better for the grave. Such men deserve some public thrashing; yet they will instigate the myopic minds to war that they have been kidnapped by some bojuboju Fulanis. Enough for the so-called jafojos, after all, there is no freedom fighter, Tompolo, Boyloaf, Asari Dokubo, Ateke Tom, Odumakins, FFK are good examples.

I had tried coming around few weeks ago but I was quickly sent back to my closet to scurry through the lose papers and bonded documents as well as stack of books that I inherited from my grandfather all in the bid to help the assemblymen locate the original Budget of Change presented before them and submitted in their chamber by the President himself. As I was rummaging, even my thrash can, my mind was inundated with that trite: What a Nation? Hardly have I settled down to continue my task when the news broke that it has been found that it was gaveled by Saraki that some furtive doctoring credited to Ita Enang  had been discovered and the gimmickry that followed put one off completely. That settled amidst other socio-political ills then we are back to sub-zero; the padding and padding and padding of mind boggling figures that even made Aso Rock a rented property to be paid for due to the occupation of the Nigeria’s President. The only thing they forgot is the padded figures to buy pads for the wives, daughters and women in the lives of the occupants of Aso Rock. Crazy!

Obviously, the APC is not prepared for leadership in any way. The muddy way they are handling the socio-economic cum political situations of the country and the puerile alibis being presented for the attendant failure are all pointers. I want to continue to believe that PMB still holds his words as his bond in this social contract that he entered into with us on 29th May, 2015 and one would have expected the Presidency he heads to have acted in all maturity by admitting their insolence in not doing their due diligence in the budget preparation and request the withdrawal of the budget having realized that such was fraught with many errors and absolute fraud but the ego of infallibility, which in itself is a failure of leadership, is exposing their notorious fayawo move leading to national and international ridicule. Much for the budget of change that changes nothing about the budget structure and texture. One would have expected Mr Lai Mohammed to move with the same jet speed he employs each time he wants to reel his usual excuse of  “blame Jonathan for what you are experiencing” to denounce those figures being bandied around as lies but much for the government of change. It is also disheartening that the same APC that campaigned and begged the people to give them their votes and go back to sleep because they are bringing change is the same party that is sending us back to the sinkhole, even worse.

It is also glaring that the PDP is not prepared for opposition as it is a party of conglomeration of foxes that are only interested in ‘apapinnism’ and since the honey is no more flowing their way they scamper here and there to escape the wrath with which the broom will sweep the tattered umbrella; shameless show of gullibility.

There is a meta-normal grimy belly of corruption in the heart of every society. It takes a genuine leader to find it, excavate it and cure it. A bad one will attenuate it to mere pilfering and its reign will continue with unbridled normalcy. The former is mis-normal, the latter is abnormal. Kudos to PMB’s anti-corruption stance but I wonder if there is not more than one beneficiary of ?#?Dasukigate in APC. The fester of the broom should not be featherweight on the roaches and lizards on this side while unleashing Mike Tyson’s pummels on the yam eaters on the other side. Let this anti-corruption be balanced, better still, appear to be so.

The democratic tripod of this nation is defective; the composition of the National Assembly is odoriferous to its foundation, the executive is bereft of insight and political capital to pursue a true national agenda while the Judiciary which is mouthed as the last hope of the common man is in dearth of true Daniel dashing the hopes on the altar of wetin-you-bring-come. The indolence of an average Nigerian like you and me is allowing the decay to fester the more.

That most of the current crops lawmakers are bunch of rapacious individuals that will stop at nothing to realize their avaritia is no news that we will continue to maintain our siddonlook posture is what is baffling. That a man or woman will be called forward to answer to question bothering on his/her integrity should be enough reason to send such to the back door of political oblivion but here we are: the head of the LAWMAKERS will leave that elevated seat to sit in a dock answering to are-you-guilty-or-not for trying to circumvent the LAW guiding Asset Declaration of Public/Elected Officers yet his motor boys like that poly-roguish sanafabi ( I watched him on Tv the other day appellating his ogas in a way not different from the agberos only that he was speaking some Aluta English) will come dressed like epo epa – groundnut shell- to tell the world about the sanctity of the office of the Senate President and some godforsaken youths will be hailing and defending these executive miscreants. Those better-to-have-not-been-born–children-of-errors will even carry placards and disturb the flow of traffic, even on social media, in the name of hero-worshiping those that they failed to realize are the architects their fathers failed impart knowledge into them. It beats my imagination that the common sense one amongst the lawmakers who will not stop mouthing patriotism got a book launched the other day but the presenter and reviewer are both imported goods.

Don’t expect anything tangible from this government because what Jonathan and his cohorts alone did to the economy may take several years for succession of  hardworking governments, which APC seem not to be, to recover not to mention the many other wicked holes that were drilled into this economy by other past administrations.

My Pastor (though am waiting for further list of marabouts and prayer warriors in Dasukigate to surface)  started a series on How To Prosper In The Midst Of Famine since the beginning of this year and I am enjoying it while I continue to fortify my local government. Mind you, I am not talking about those derelict buildings where those thieves parading themselves as council chairmen occupy. I am talking about sinking of my own boreholes, generating my own power from my high-power generator, paying my dues to the security guards – OPC, Bakassi boys, et al.

So long I can maintain my local government this change may never come.

Debayo Coker is a writer., adebay_c

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