#FromTheDarkRoom: One Little Death – Japheth J. Omojuwa
Published:15 Aug, 2015
He died yesterday! He said to me, you are going too fast, you are doing too much, and you are scaring everyone… he died yesterday!
To be alive today is to be guilty! Cynicism has become the oxygen of existence, we drink it, we eat it and we live it. We do not believe in one another and ourselves anymore, how then can we even believe in a common humanity?
A child needs a dose of inspiration on her birthday, reaches out to a celebrity she has never seen for some of it, “please retweet this to make my day!” or “please, wish me a happy birthday!” and like a gift never expected even when desired, the tweet and retweet happen. And what happens? The crowd gets in, “you are begging for a retweet?” “You must have low self esteem issues,” “what is in a retweet?” and all those words and statements from the predictable bible of cynicism as the world’s biggest court room unleashes judgment from its never resting judges.
But you don’t see it, it was your birthday, the tweet, retweet and the message from that person you loved, without any reason even you can explain, that message changed everything. It inspired you, it made you believe, in the midst of everything, someone cares enough for you to do something for you, little it seems, but it was done for you and like the sun, shines on everyone but not everyone knows how much each sunlight means, you value that gift.
You are happy, though momentary, how long does that feeling last? Oh As long as you want it to because, this life is what you make of it. You can save the moments of happiness within, your mind is the only bank only you can determine who steals from. So, you save those moments for when the world throws contrary ones at you. Happiness can be created and recreated. It is the essence of recycling. Nostalgia comes close. You cannot live happily, ever after or ever for the moment, without at first finding happiness inside of you.
It’s in the eyes you see in the mirror, in the old pictures you took at places you may never be again, in the words of children, their innocence and your guilt for when you were their age and always wanting to grow up quickly. Adulthood you feel turned out to be a lie but it died! You are a new you. You can be that child with the responsibilities of an adult. You can see the beauty in a flying butterfly and even see the value in a roadside beggar. You see more. You feel more. You want to take everything, live through it all. They will judge and abuse, curse and word-beat you, but you are never going down except you lower yourself to their expectations.
They hate the fact you are single, they know no story about the one you have loved, the one who loved you back and the unwholesome realities that for once defeated the soaring power of two love birds.
Who do you blame, when you have done all within your powers, said it all, thought it all, and it just never fits together? You blame no one. If you can do it again, try again. If you cannot do it again, let it be. God knows best. Let it die! In peace. That you, that cared about the report from others, that you, that thought so much into the canvas of you painted by those who don’t see your mind, who see your face but never see your heart. Let it die! Because, too many die everyday. No, they don’t lose their breath, deprived of oxygen forever and let go of life. They just die!
One bad word from the crowd; One little death! A failed marriage or relationship; one little death. A lost friendship that never should have been; one little death. A lost job; one little death. The doctor report that should never have been; one little death! Death everyday, you don’t see it because it creeps up on you like time, slowly but surely, moving and never stopping, the little death that comes with losing sight of the beautiful, of your progress and the love the world has to share. The love you have to give.
Because the world tells you that you are guilty of everything, all that happens to you and all that you happen to; so, you dress your guilt, wrap it up and leave it in your heart. It grows, becomes real and eats at your joy; one little death.
Day by day, you live it to the full and live it on your terms, doing your best to make each day count, for you and for others. And to remember; you live one little day more in joy and fulfillment or you die one little death.
He died yesterday! He never had much say in my life, because I always ventured, always said what I felt, how I felt it and to whom I felt it but I saw there was still a little life in the doubts within, so I crushed it! I killed it! One little thing, that tiny doubt, I killed it!
Because, the world of creation was made of little things and destruction comes in bits. That little death; kills you faster than the death you fear the most! Live today!
But if you must die a little death, die as a seed, sprout again, bloom and blossom, bear fruits that give life.
#SpeakWithJJ #AnotherDay #AnotherBeginning #LiveJustLive #DoItDoYouDoRight