#Birthdaybuzz: I Am Done With Life – By @Obajeun

obajeun-photoI have a pact with life. Passing through the years, it has been exciting, zingy and equally displeasing. But such is how it should be. An ‘unfair’ God created an unfair life. Apology to the ‘saint’. Life in itself is unfair. So I don’t usually expect fair treatment from humans. As such, it is very hard for me to be disappointed. Those who broke my heart in the past were stunned with the way I carried on with my life seamlessly. Now they want to mend the broken heart, but I am done with them! I have left them behind, I have since moved!

I am done with life…happy birthday to me

Long years of eluding dreams, long years of fulfilled dreams, I got it in equal portion. Beautiful manuscripts wiped off  by the tears of mother nature. It was a long night of cries, flood came visiting. Now I have discrete stories, but still struggling to string them. I have suffered a mental loss, a productive loss that could have moved me a step further. There is no longer pain in my voice since I can now identify the color of agony. I have moved far away from yesterday, yesterday of nothingness, yesterday of grills, yesterday of  dream backlashes.

I am done with life…happy birthday to me

In my growing up years, failure was my partner. But every of my failure was a success in waiting. So anytime I failed, I moved a step further. Then at a point, everybody wanted to fail like me. I knew from childhood that I would not toe the path of Abraham Lincoln. My head flattened out due to long years of hawking. It was a routine, from school to the streets, customers would be expecting. With a short stint as a heap scavenger before I was 10, my curiosity metamorphosed into a beast. Last weekend, I went back to the same heap, not to scavenge this time, but to tell the new generation of scavengers stories. After all, I was a founding member.

I am done with life…happy birthday to me

Now I am blessed, not with material wealth, but with riches of lovers and haters. I vocalise in rich languages, some people call it show off. I use wisdom to open up minds, some call it pride. In this course, looters have approached me to be their image projector, I declined. I select calls to pick, some friends threw me away like a tasteless chewed gum. I don’t call them friends anymore, I call them passers-by. In my story, I doubt if they will feature. I value people who value me. I break barriers to keep friends’ dreams alive. But in all, I concede to my haters the right to be sad.

I am done with life…happy birthday to me

I have been lucky and unlucky. I lost the lady after my heart, my mum. If I had finished school earlier, she could have been saved. I missed my dream of making my first million at 22, of becoming a chartered accountant at 24 – my ATS results are dusty. I am calm and loving, so I like ladies – not what you think. I have a facial disadvantage, too soft to be seen as a serious leader. So I deviced my leadership style, it is working for me. I don’t talk often, I get more by listening, though I am not a conformist, I may appear as one.

I am done with life…happy birthday to me

I was a cook to a family of six for six years. I grew up without parental tutelage, but with self guidance. A time came, I went on exile to Oshodi. Oshodi bridge played host to me for some nights when I was 13, just to be inspired to complete a poem. So I made friends with kids who were on exile on the streets. I did not leave Oshodi until police messed me up. The same poem later made me a mini celebrity when it was published in The Guardian. Then I fell in love with literature. I hate Nigerian police. The demise of my Physics teacher in secondary school, again, changed my trajectory in life. He was cheated by life. I would never trust life, I would never be disappointed.

I am done with life…happy birthday to me

I have conquered my own world. I am a free man today, free from the burden of waiting for the future – the future is here, free from the bondage of hopelessness, free from the thought of destitution, free from the fear of the unknown. My flattened head is back in shape. My voice is  clear and loud. Today I speak to thousands, I get paid for telling my stories. Out of 36, I have been to 30 states in Nigeria, not in search of greener pasture but in search of the truth, in search of desolated souls, in search of people in need of my stories to move. Not because I am the only one with stories but because I talk wisdom, I write wisdom. I am building people’s dreams. I am enriching my generation. Don’t call it pride, this is me.

I am done with life…happy birthday to me

I keep a low profile. In my travels to 18 countries, I have not met a single soul exactly like me. I am uniquely created. Not pride, it will be suicidal for you to floor me in logic. I practice engineering, I love literature because I weave words, I live my whole life in philosophy. I go about with my opinions and I don’t impose them. I am always close to tears, too emotional to be a man, may be because I am still single. I have wept for Nigeria in corridors, I love Nigeria. Until the country change, I will not keep quite, I will not rest my case.

I have recovered quickly from my past. I am starting anew all over again. For the ones I have offended, let’s start together. For the ones I will still offend, I wish you well. Old things have past away, behold, it is a new chapter. I am done with life, never to struggle with life, never to struggle with what is not mine. Life is not mine, God owns it. He gives and takes. As I move closer to my grave, I am reminded that life is ephemeral. I don’t want jets, I want God. Don’t wish me long life, wish me good life. I want comfort to comfort others, don’t give me loud wealth. Hate me and be sad, mock me as I move up  and you stay glued. Don’t waste your life hating me, your life is not yours. For me, I am done with life, I am a free man. Happy birthday to me.

It is me, @Obajeun

He blogs Reach him on twitter via @Obajeun

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