OPINION: The ‘Clueless’ Shoe No Longer Fits His Excellency – by Folorunso David @funsodavid

Published:2 Feb, 2013

President-JonathanI take no pleasure in insulting Mr Goodluck Jonathan. The story of his ascent to the presidency when isolated from his performance so far in that office is one that has the semblance of Old Testament rhapsody (reserve your Hallelujah for later). Some people extend that analogy further to suggest that he is God’s anointed one – with an eponym and a grass-to-grace story that overwhelmingly match, most Nigerians were coaxed into voting him in 2011 without actually parsing the facts. Two questions: First, how do you isolate a man’s deeds from his personality at the polls? Second, does God really hate us that much as to anoint and then impose (?) a clueless – I shall come to that shortly – leader on us? These questions, however relevant, have the sour taste of the proverbial spilt milk. For now, I am saddled with a contemporary bother, one that hinges on semantics but is at the same time frightening.

I pride myself in an etymological pastime so early this year I tried to find out how Mr Goodluck Jonathan’s critics collectively decided to adopt the word ‘clueless’ as his most unflattering moniker.  I wanted to know who first used the adjective, who next used it and how it caught on with other Nigerians. My research is on-going but besides my collection of newspaper clippings, bookmarked internet pages and random discourse with self-styled pundits it is no more than a pastime. However, in pursuing this harmless and purely academic endeavour I realised we have been wrong all along. We have been fooled to disguise our president’s true nature with a mild description that doesn’t even scratch the surface.

A relevant digression:  As an undergraduate pharmacy student I had a lecturer who always held her shoulders high – both figuratively and literally. She never really stood out in my regard or disregard until I noticed a pattern with her. Whenever one of my classmates made a ‘mistake’ of asking a relevant question which she was unsure of; instead of politely admitting that she did not know the answer and promise to get back to him or her later (we’re all humans, aren’t we?) she would go into overdrive, filibuster about the effrontery of the student to have asked the question, lambast his or her sartorial taste and when she’d spoken at length without any reference to the hanging question she would move on with the lecture. Covering her ignorance with her arrogance was her default way to overcome the distress of her cluelessness. Except for the ‘her’ that last statement may as well be referring to a certain Goodluck Jonathan. After all, if the shoe fits he might as well wear it. But my assertion is borne out of mundane reasons.

First, there is the issue of the Police College in Lagos. Without the unbiased reportage of Channels Television the college and its decadence would not have got the deserving attention it did in national media. How does Mr President react to all this? First and very much to his credit, he visited the college in the wake of the report. Second, but disgustingly out of sync with the first, he implicitly blames Channels Television and the party officials of opposition parties for the calamities that have befallen that citadel of police-training. My reaction was a thought-out-loud bollocks. Pardon my French. I simply could not put one and two together. Could our president be the king of dimwits? More pertinent to this write-up, this episode illustrates lack of clues but more so trademark arrogance that belies the barefoot-to-Versace story which we all ate during his presidential campaign.

Second, there is the issue of University of Lagos. Renaming a Federal University that was founded by the provisions of the Nigerian constitution to something you thought of after having your morning cereal is a storyline best suited for an episode of Tinsels. Still it happened that on a day most ironically set apart to mark the end of military-style autocracy and unilateralism Mr Goodluck Jonathan announced a change of a university’s name without following due process. For days students of the university protested around the Yaba suburbs of Lagos and we thought His Excellency the Name-Changer would realise the folly of his action. No he hasn’t. Rather he has apparently denied the institution the right to host its annual convocation ceremony until the name change is implemented. You still call him clueless? All I see is arrogance.

Fellow Nigerians, while it does not detract from his overall cluelessness, we are dealing with the most arrogant president in the history of Nigeria – arguably, of course. Again, I do not take pleasure in insulting our president but it would be tomfoolery to analyse his overall personality and not point out his flaws. Cluelessness I can deal with relatively (again, we’re all humans, aren’t we?); it’s the arrogance that is eating me up. An arrogant president would not have the modesty to ask his critics to proffer solutions in times of national crisis; would not listen to the voice of better reasoning because the speaker is from another political party; would not see fellow Nigerians as equal; would not heed the warnings of time-tested experts seriously. An arrogant leader would only do one thing: lead others blindly in a headlong rush to failure. (As an aside, I did ace the course that arrogant university lecturer took me thanks to textbooks). It may count as insulting to classify Mr Goodluck Jonathan as arrogant but the truth needs to be said: Better a purely clueless president than one who alloys it up with arrogance. You may now shout Hallelujah.

 

Folorunso David can be reached on twitter @funsodavid

Related Posts

Recent Posts

Nigeria-Bound Terror Chief Was Coming On Invitation – Report

According to a report by Daily Trust, wanted terrorist, Ahmed Al-Assir, who was arrested in Lebanon on his way to Nigeria, was coming on the invitation of a foreign company operating in the country.  Sources in Nigeria’s security circles, who spoke to Daily Trust on condition of anonymity, said the visa was issued by a Foreign Service official in Beirut based on that invitation. According to the sources, without a letter of invitation...

Photos From BBOG’s Rally In Abuja

The Catholic Archbishop of Abuja, Cardinal John Onaiyekan and Shiekh Nuru Imam joined members of the Bring Back Our Girls group in a peaceful rally to commemorate 500 days since the Chibok girls were abducted by Boko Haram members. The advocacy group also had a candle light session this evening. They tied red ribbons on some trees in Abuja to serve as a constant reminder that the girls are still not back. More photos below...

Boko haram Slaughters 28 In Fresh Attack In Borno

28 people were slaughtered after Boko Haram members attacked Mafurnudi in Damboa LGA of Borno State, on Tuesday. A resident of the state Abubakar Jojo, who confirmed the killings, said ''They attacked our people in Mafurnudi village on Tuesday but we learned about it today because there are no telecommunications in Damboa area. Twenty-four men and eight others suffered gun wounds. They carted away all their foodstuffs and set their homes ablaze,'' he told SaharaReporters

Nicki Minaj To Open The VMAs

?According to a press release from MTV, Nicki Minaj will open the 2015 Video Music Awards on Sunday. Minaj teased the announcement earlier on Instagram and Twitter, with a Moonman in a sonogram. Nicki later deleted the teaser and tweet but it's definitely happening, according to MTV.

What Do You Think About Miley Cyrus? Miley Gets Shocking Answers As She Goes Undercover

?During her Wednesday night appearance on ?Jimmy Kimmel Live?, Miley did many things — wore nipple pasties; talked about how her boobs make Paul McCartney uncomfortable — but most hilariously, she disguised herself as an Australian TV reporter named Janet and asked people on the streets of L.A. what they thought of her. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=juSrk9VUkUU Credit: Jimmy...

Tyga Flaunts Bank Withdrawal At Paparazzi

Tyga's bank account is still stacked and he wants everyone to know it. He walked out of a Calabasas bank Thursday afternoon with a wad of hundreds and he made sure to flash it for cameras. Doesn't look like the nearly $300k he spent on Kylie Jenner's Ferrari and the thousands in back rent he owes are slowing him down in the cash department ... he also sped off in a Bentley. Credit: 

Protest At Times Square As New York Authorities Move To Ban Posing Topless

?Posing topless in Times Square in New York City has been legal since 1992, and Mayor De Blasio and Governor Cuomo are currently trying to ban it. One of the topless women, Saira thinks the attempt to ban being topless is helping their cause. " made it actually better, and letting people pick a side. Are you on our side or are you on their side? And we have a lot more people on our side than I think...

Kim Kardashian To Cut Her Uterus After Baby No. 2?

Kim Kardashian's current pregnancy may be her last.

Woman Grows Gigantic Horn In The Middle Of Her Head

An elderly Chinese villager has been dubbed “the unicorn woman” due to an abnormal growth on her head that looks like a large horn, it’s reported. Liang Xiuzhen started growing something that resembled a “black mole” on her head around eight years ago, according to her son Wang Chaojun. The 87-year-old, from Guiyan village in Ziyang City, Sichuan Province, was left stunned when two years ago it gave way to a finger-sized horn-like mass.

Ugochukwu Favour-Mayor: Linda Ikeji Is Making Millionaires From Her Self-made

From the timeless word that says, “If you see a woman that has everything going for her, and you’re not ready to add value to her life, just admire her from afar. Please, don’t interrupt her greatness.” And extremely, it is difficult being a woman in a society like ours. Here, the women are facing the challenge of identity. And I think after our Queen,...

Kim Kardashian Allegedly Trying To Stop Amber Rose’s Reality TV Show

Kim Kardashian has reportedly ‘tried her hardest’ to prevent Amber Rose/Black Chyna's reality TV show from ever happening. And failing that, it’s believed that Kim will stop at nothing to make sure that no one watches their soon-to-be filmed MTV reality show. “This is the worst possible scenario for the Kardashians,” a source told RadarOnline.com, adding: “Giving these two more of a voice than they already have is going to be...

Bolt To Retire After 2016 Olympics?

Usain Bolt will decide after next year’s Rio Olympics whether to retire or continue until the London 2017 world championships. The Jamaican star Bolt told the BBC after in Thursday’s 10th career world title in Beijing, in the 200m, that he is `50-50’ on whether he will compete in London, where he won a second Olympic treble in 2012. “I really want to run at London but I think the sport is not as fun...

Kingsley Ohajunwa: Before We Get Distracted By The Corruption Fight

Corruption has been a clog in the wheel of progress in Nigeria; there are too many corrupt individuals in Nigeria; the level of corruption in the civil service is gargantuan and mind-blowing; political office holders embezzle funds meant for projects, effectuation of progammes and welfare of the people; Nigeria has continually been ranked as one of the most corrupt countries in the world; the level of Foreign Direct Investment (FDI) has continually dwindled as a result of...

Dangote Inaugurates $250 Million Plant In Cameroon

Dangote Cement Plc inaugurates a 250 million-dollar (N48.75 billion) cement grinding plant in Douala, Cameroon. Dangote Group also laid the foundation stone for a 200 metre jetty in Douala. Alhaji Aliko Dangote, President/ Chief Executive, Dangote Group, said at the ceremony, that the plant, with a capacity of 1.5 million metric tonnes per annum (mmtpa), was a great feat in the operations of the company. "The plant is our largest greenfield project in a neighbouring country...

Information Ministry Workers Protest Against Staff Negligence, Fund Misappropriation

Workers of the Ministry of Information have staged a protest against what they described as the ministry’s negligence of staff welfare and gross misappropriation of public funds. The protesters who gathered at the Radio House in Abuja, urged President Muhammadu Buhari to probe activities of the ministry’s Permanent Secretary, who they accused of mismanagement of the Subsidy Re-investment and Empowerment Programme (SURE-P) funds, non-payment of allowances, refusal to train staff, among others. Read More: 

David De Gea Called Up To Spain Squad

The goalkeeper has earned a spot, despite not playing for Manchester United this season, while Juan Mata and Diego Costa return. David de Gea has been called up to the Spain squad for the Euro 2016 qualifiers next month, despite being frozen out of the Manchester United side. De Gea has not featured for the Red Devils since...

Kaduna State appoints DG, Lands and Survey

The Kaduna State Government has announced the appointment of a Director-General for its Department of Lands, Survey and Country Planning. The new DG is HussainiIbrahim Garba. Until his appointment, Garba was Director, Town and Country Planning. A statement signed by Samuel Aruwan, Special Assistant, Media and Publicity, said that Garba will be the first DG since the Kaduna State Government decided that the erstwhile Ministry of Lands, Survey and Country Planning will become a department in the Governor’s Office. Born in 1960, Garba attended Barewa College, Zaria. He earned...

Ambode Condoles With El-Rufai Over Father’s Death

Lagos State governor, Mr Akinwunmi Ambode, has condoled with his Kaduna State counterpart, Malam Nasir El-Rufai over the passage of his foster father, Malam Yahaya Hamza, in the late hours of Tuesday, urging him to take solace in the fact that the deceased lived a fulfilled life. Ambode’s condolence message was contained in a statement issued on  Thursday by his Chief Press Secretary (CPS), Mr Habib Aruna and was made available to newsmen. “I condole...

Enhance Media Salary, NUJ Urges FG

The Nigerian Union of Journalists NUJ, on Friday urged the Federal Government to enhance media salary because “journalism deserves better care like other professions”. The union’s National President, Mr Waheed Odusile, told the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) in Yenagoa that improving on media wellbeing would go a long way in enhancing performance. Odusile decried the way graduates working in the government owned media were being treated, describing the media as strong body in nation...

Non-Humans Voted in Akwa-ibom State – Tribunal Forensic Expert

One of the forensic experts who testified before the Akwa Ibom State governorship tribunal Thursday, said out of the 140, 832 finger prints on ballot papers matched (scanned and analyzed) over 100,000 were non- human prints. The witness was testifying in the gubernatorial election suit between Umana Umana of the All Progressive congress (APC) and governor of Akwa Ibom State, Udom Emmanuel, who was the candidate for the Peoples Democratic Party in the election. Umana had approached...

NYSC Secures N200 Million For Corps Members

Director General of National Youth Corps Service, NYSC, Brigadier-General Johnson Olawumi, has disclosed that the scheme had secured over N200 million bank facilities to be accessed by corps members as a start-up capital in businesses. Olawumi revealed this shortly after he met with Commander, Guard Brigade, Brigadier-General Musa Sanni Yusuf, to forge collaboration on skills acquisition programme for serving corps members in Abuja. To this end, the DG directed the NYSC Director, Skills Acquisition and...