The Things We Have Control Over – Oreoluwa Aboluwarin @oreoluwade

Published:15 Nov, 2012

TheThings We Have Control Over – Oreoluwa Aboluwarin @oreoluwade

The reports made of us at our demise or on special occasions involving recognition comes in two forms:

 

Tales of woes told by foes, or of victories narrated by contemporaries.

 

Aside the awesome influence of the supreme diety upon our lives, man indeed owes a large portion of what he makes of himself to himself.

 

Now, there are various factors that ulimately decide what we would be remembered for, the ill or good spoken of us, what we would have achieved, the legacies we leave behind. However, the one that interests me for the purpose of this ‘charge’ is what we make of the things we have control over.

 

 ‘Aside the awesome influence of the supreme diety upon our lives, man indeed owes a large portion of what he makes of himself to himself.’

There have been stories told through time of people who have prevailed under the worst forms of adversities, standing out as beacons, illuminating even the paths of generations yet unborn due to their daunting resolves and staunchness. History is littered with the blind people who became forces and reference points, those considered retarded early in life by neutral observers, those disabled from birth or maimed under unfortunate circumstances, dyslexia patients who ended up becoming the inventors of amazing creations, lowly born people who made their environment aglow with their sparkling brilliance, the weak and those ordinarily considered mediocre who found the strength from within to stay afloat.

 

If you’re sat down to hear of these stories, I’m sure some will bring tears to your eyes. I’m sure you’d pay rapt attention to the extraordinary tales of “AHAS” and “HURRAHS” some of them have to say, their highs and lows and how they managed to make something out of nothing.

 

It is very easy to see a man at the point of his elevation, the PROCESS that took him there though is a different ball game entirely. The world craves results, pinnacles of careers, standout performance in situations, acclaim in events, yet one basic thing we fail to CONSTANTLY do is work for it.

 

Why we wallow in the ‘commonplace’ is simple. We simply do not direct our efforts at the things we can help. This is why man ordinarily finds a way to lay the blame for his incompetence and non-productiveness at the foot of another. We are envious of those who have made it, attributing their successes to lucky patches or random glitches in the natural order. What I consider a malady is the eloquence some of us have found in explaining away our idiocies in tackling some random force or power that influences our daily lives and threaten our existence. We are quick to find reasons why “we can’t” or “it can’t be done”

 

 ‘It is very easy to see a man at the point of his elevation, the PROCESS that took him there though is a different ball game entirely’.

Yes, I would be lying if I said all that we have to do to make it depends on us. However, I reckon that it is easy to see what we want to be in the future, the problem we face is that we don’t act in accordance now. Hence, we build our future happiness and achievements on imaginary platforms, hopeless foundations.

 

A man who blows steam always, moans and groans over how the world will not devote itself to making him happy will ALWAYS find himself far from where he hopes to be. The simple act of reveling in our reveries and incessantly using the “WHAT IF” statement vocally or inside us can only take us further down the abyss of nothingness. Only the proactive are rewarded. The complainants, the lazy ones drown in their miseries!

 

  ‘The world craves results, pinnacles of careers, standout performance in situations, acclaim in events, yet one basic thing we fail to CONSTANTLY do is work for it’.

We allow ourselves to be unnecessarily bothered about the things we can’t help, focusing too much attention, directing too much animosity, utilizing so much of our strength on them, attributes which would better have been channeled elsewhere.

 

We allow our actions to be based on the opinions of others, we follow the joneses, we have no minds of our own, we overanalyze situations till golden opportunities pass us by. Then the “HAD I KNOWN” sets in.

 

A man who blows steam always, moans and groans over how the world will not devote itself to making him happy will ALWAYS find himself far from where he hopes to be’.

The wise one really should quit being redundant and inactive, he truly should refuse to allow temporal inconveniences prevent his efforts. QUIT THINKING TOO MUCH. IF IT FEELS RIGHT, IT PROBABLY IS, SO JUST GO WITH IT, ELSE GO WITH ANOTHER. Indecision and dilly-dallying have ensured many a man never crosses the benchmark of “average” in his miserable life.

 

Do not abandon your dreams because you don’t get it right at the first time, at the same time be open to experiences all around that will eventually shape you into the desired YOU. Failure is not all about gross poverty, sometimes it has to do with the fact that we simply didn’t do the things that would have made us happy, given us satisfaction, these are the things we have control over.

 

As much as you aim for the top spots, as much as you crave relevance, as much as you believe you have to be involved in the rat-race, take things at a good stride (not any stride, not necessarily with levity). Learn to dwell more on the things you can do something about, not the colour of your skin, your country, your religion, past results. These things have happened already, THEY CAN’T BE CHANGED!

 

When a man realizes his purpose, recognizes his place, works at the things in the circle of his influence, goes for what he believes in, the chronicles of him narrated at any point in time will be good ones. And while you’re at it ensure not to step on toes or use people around you as foot mats. Always remember THE SKY IS EXPANSIVE ENOUGH TO CONTAIN A MILLION STARS.

 

Yes, you don’t have an input in natural occurrences, you sometimes don’t have a say in what people think of you or their decisions, yet you can choose to be happy while others are sad, defiant in the face of adversity, grateful when complaining would seem easier, watchful when sleeping is more convenient, persistent when giving up seems the reasonable thing to do to the simple minded. You can ALWAYS choose how you react with what happens to you. Also, you can choose sometimes what happens to you by your simple actions!

 

Do what you love to do, do what you are called to do, do what you feel like doing and most importantly, do what you can do something about. The rest is grossly irrelevant. You to a large extent are the most important determinant of your happiness while the earth you yet inhabit.

 

Till next time, STAY ON TOP! Cheers!

 

 

OREOLUWA ABOLUWARIN

Interact with me on twitter @oreoluwade

 

  • http://wwww.zebbook.wordpress.com zebbook

    I had to read and re-read this a couple of times, it’s filled with so much wisdom I fear I would be doing myself serious harm by reading it just once. This is life’s manual for success, words on marble, the secret ingredient with which achievers make their meal. I hope everyone reads this and pass it on to their neighbours. Well done Sir!

    ‘Do what you love to do, do what you are called to do, do what you feel like doing and most importantly, do what you can do something about’.

  • ayo David

    very well said brother. i believe we must all face what we have to acheive instead of commenting ignorantly on what another man calls acheivement. great thinking.

  • Ronnie

    I’m afraid that we allow the thief of time steal away our most treasured moments, when all we see are; the whys’, the hows’ and the whats’…Weldone Oreoluwa!

  • Kabolobari

    This article makes an impression, a correct assessment of man-style judgement, and offers but an obvious conclusive, rather didactic, solution. I enjoyed it and,…

    (Great, it had to be prose!)

  • http://bezalelkreations.webs.com Abah Harmony Matthew

    WOW! Sir, this absolutely Amazing and I think this should be publish on National Dailies so more People, especially the youths can read! May GOD grant you more wisdom! Good one!

  • olumide

    Do what you love to do, do what you are called to do, do what you feel like doing and most importantly, do what you can do something about’.Emphasis on DO-great one Oreoluwa

Related Posts

Recent Posts

Praiz, 9ice, Pasuma And Others Set For Battle At The Celebrity Fans Challenge Tomorrow !

The biggest and most exciting celebrity football party is back  !Kiibati Bankole presents another exciting edition of her novel celebrity football contest- Celebrity Fans Challenge; and this time around, it is bigger than ever, as some of Nigeria's biggest names in entertainment go head to head for bragging rights and the title of Nigeria's biggest celebrity SUPERFAN!The celebrities include 9ice, fuji ace- Pasuma, Reminisce, Praiz, Gbenga Adeyinka(GCON), Illbliss, Nollywood stars Segun Arinze and Fred Amata; and representing the ladies- Simi (Jamb...

Troops Kill Boko Haram Members Dressed In Nigerian Military Uniform

Boko Haram members dressed in Nigerian military uniform were killed during a raid of the sect members camp in the North East. See the photos after the cut...be warned it's graphic!

#Pausibility: Gehazi, Vuvuzela-General And The Lesson For The New Generation By Adebayo Coker.

The diverse reactions that were triggered by the recent appointments of the President are funnily incredulous. Very soon we will hear Dauralization or Patriarchization. We voted PMB to deliver to us chenji then we complain when he selected his team. PMB has chosen the people he wants to work with; I hope when playtime comes he will consider some of us. September is a month to look forward to. My...

Chad Sentences 10 Boko Haram Members To Death

Chad has sentenced 10 members of Nigeria-based Islamist militant group Boko Haram to death on terrorism charges, judicial sources said on Friday. "They are all sentenced to death," said one of the sources. Chad's capital N'Djamena, less than 100 kilometres from the Nigerian border, was hit by a series of suicide bombings in June and July that killed more than 40 people. Source: Trust.org

Fayose Appoints 72-yr Old Carpenter As Council Boss

Governor Ayodele Fayose of Ekiti State Friday appointed a 72-year old Carpenter and illiterate, Mr Olatunde Afolayan as the caretaker chairman of Moba Local Government. Fayose, also sworn in members of the State Independent Electoral Commission, headed by a retired Chief Judge of the State, Justice Kayode Bamisile , to be able to conduct local government elections before the end of the year. After administering the oaths on the appointees, Fayose told President Muhammadu Buhari to remove Mrs Amina...

Van Gaal Targets Revenge Against Swansea

The Swans recorded a historic double over Manchester United last season, including victory in the manager's opening game, but the Dutchman says his squad is now more prepared Louis van Gaal is targeting revenge as he prepares his Manchester United squad to face Swansea City. Goals from Ki Sung-yueng and Gylfi Sigurdsson saw Van Gaal lose his first...

Nigeria-Bound Terror Chief Was Coming On Invitation – Report

According to a report by Daily Trust, wanted terrorist, Ahmed Al-Assir, who was arrested in Lebanon on his way to Nigeria, was coming on the invitation of a foreign company operating in the country.  Sources in Nigeria’s security circles, who spoke to Daily Trust on condition of anonymity, said the visa was issued by a Foreign Service official in Beirut based on that invitation. According to the sources, without a letter of invitation...

Photos From BBOG’s Rally In Abuja

The Catholic Archbishop of Abuja, Cardinal John Onaiyekan and Shiekh Nuru Imam joined members of the Bring Back Our Girls group in a peaceful rally to commemorate 500 days since the Chibok girls were abducted by Boko Haram members. The advocacy group also had a candle light session this evening. They tied red ribbons on some trees in Abuja to serve as a constant reminder that the girls are still not back. More photos below...

Boko haram Slaughters 28 In Fresh Attack In Borno

28 people were slaughtered after Boko Haram members attacked Mafurnudi in Damboa LGA of Borno State, on Tuesday. A resident of the state Abubakar Jojo, who confirmed the killings, said ''They attacked our people in Mafurnudi village on Tuesday but we learned about it today because there are no telecommunications in Damboa area. Twenty-four men and eight others suffered gun wounds. They carted away all their foodstuffs and set their homes ablaze,'' he told SaharaReporters

Nicki Minaj To Open The VMAs

?According to a press release from MTV, Nicki Minaj will open the 2015 Video Music Awards on Sunday. Minaj teased the announcement earlier on Instagram and Twitter, with a Moonman in a sonogram. Nicki later deleted the teaser and tweet but it's definitely happening, according to MTV.

What Do You Think About Miley Cyrus? Miley Gets Shocking Answers As She Goes Undercover

?During her Wednesday night appearance on ?Jimmy Kimmel Live?, Miley did many things — wore nipple pasties; talked about how her boobs make Paul McCartney uncomfortable — but most hilariously, she disguised herself as an Australian TV reporter named Janet and asked people on the streets of L.A. what they thought of her. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=juSrk9VUkUU Credit: Jimmy...

Tyga Flaunts Bank Withdrawal At Paparazzi

Tyga's bank account is still stacked and he wants everyone to know it. He walked out of a Calabasas bank Thursday afternoon with a wad of hundreds and he made sure to flash it for cameras. Doesn't look like the nearly $300k he spent on Kylie Jenner's Ferrari and the thousands in back rent he owes are slowing him down in the cash department ... he also sped off in a Bentley. Credit: 

Protest At Times Square As New York Authorities Move To Ban Posing Topless

?Posing topless in Times Square in New York City has been legal since 1992, and Mayor De Blasio and Governor Cuomo are currently trying to ban it. One of the topless women, Saira thinks the attempt to ban being topless is helping their cause. " made it actually better, and letting people pick a side. Are you on our side or are you on their side? And we have a lot more people on our side than I think...

Kim Kardashian To Cut Her Uterus After Baby No. 2?

Kim Kardashian's current pregnancy may be her last.

Woman Grows Gigantic Horn In The Middle Of Her Head

An elderly Chinese villager has been dubbed “the unicorn woman” due to an abnormal growth on her head that looks like a large horn, it’s reported. Liang Xiuzhen started growing something that resembled a “black mole” on her head around eight years ago, according to her son Wang Chaojun. The 87-year-old, from Guiyan village in Ziyang City, Sichuan Province, was left stunned when two years ago it gave way to a finger-sized horn-like mass.

Ugochukwu Favour-Mayor: Linda Ikeji Is Making Millionaires From Her Self-made

From the timeless word that says, “If you see a woman that has everything going for her, and you’re not ready to add value to her life, just admire her from afar. Please, don’t interrupt her greatness.” And extremely, it is difficult being a woman in a society like ours. Here, the women are facing the challenge of identity. And I think after our Queen,...

Kim Kardashian Allegedly Trying To Stop Amber Rose’s Reality TV Show

Kim Kardashian has reportedly ‘tried her hardest’ to prevent Amber Rose/Black Chyna's reality TV show from ever happening. And failing that, it’s believed that Kim will stop at nothing to make sure that no one watches their soon-to-be filmed MTV reality show. “This is the worst possible scenario for the Kardashians,” a source told RadarOnline.com, adding: “Giving these two more of a voice than they already have is going to be...

Bolt To Retire After 2016 Olympics?

Usain Bolt will decide after next year’s Rio Olympics whether to retire or continue until the London 2017 world championships. The Jamaican star Bolt told the BBC after in Thursday’s 10th career world title in Beijing, in the 200m, that he is `50-50’ on whether he will compete in London, where he won a second Olympic treble in 2012. “I really want to run at London but I think the sport is not as fun...

Kingsley Ohajunwa: Before We Get Distracted By The Corruption Fight

Corruption has been a clog in the wheel of progress in Nigeria; there are too many corrupt individuals in Nigeria; the level of corruption in the civil service is gargantuan and mind-blowing; political office holders embezzle funds meant for projects, effectuation of progammes and welfare of the people; Nigeria has continually been ranked as one of the most corrupt countries in the world; the level of Foreign Direct Investment (FDI) has continually dwindled as a result of...

Dangote Inaugurates $250 Million Plant In Cameroon

Dangote Cement Plc inaugurates a 250 million-dollar (N48.75 billion) cement grinding plant in Douala, Cameroon. Dangote Group also laid the foundation stone for a 200 metre jetty in Douala. Alhaji Aliko Dangote, President/ Chief Executive, Dangote Group, said at the ceremony, that the plant, with a capacity of 1.5 million metric tonnes per annum (mmtpa), was a great feat in the operations of the company. "The plant is our largest greenfield project in a neighbouring country...

Information Ministry Workers Protest Against Staff Negligence, Fund Misappropriation

Workers of the Ministry of Information have staged a protest against what they described as the ministry’s negligence of staff welfare and gross misappropriation of public funds. The protesters who gathered at the Radio House in Abuja, urged President Muhammadu Buhari to probe activities of the ministry’s Permanent Secretary, who they accused of mismanagement of the Subsidy Re-investment and Empowerment Programme (SURE-P) funds, non-payment of allowances, refusal to train staff, among others. Read More: