Thank God it’s Friday. And no , #opesays today will not be about overly serious stuff; well not so serious. I have been pondering on an issue, a major thorn in my flesh. I hear stories of people getting married to their first and only love and I go, really? I envy their tenacity and the depth of their love. I mean, you met a man at the age of 15, and you’re still together at 40 ? Mehn that’s some serious ish.
I am not here to give you love advice, for how can someone give advice he has not taken himself ? How about us who are not so lucky to meet that special person at 15 or date for years? I call this the broken road that most of us travel; meet someone, date someone, have a fling sometimes,meet someone better, faded interest after a while, or just pure boredom. It has been called the Stopgap Theory of Relationships by Japheth Omojuwa.
You want love too and you want it to last forever. Well, what’s wrong with the broken road ? Having several relationships tires you out emotionally and even physically, makes you weary and might even make you miss that special someone. What’s good about the broken road ? Well ,nobody is good at anything the first time. It makes you refine your strategy, up your game and know what to look out for next time.
So what am I proposing? The broken road? No. The first love? Well, if you’re lucky; but not all of us are. So what’s the best option? Date them all! When I say date, I don’t mean getting serious. Hang out with all your prospects, go out to the movies, to restaurants. Talk extensively and have a feel for what their characters and personalities are. You can do this with several people at the same time. Just make sure you never ever utter the ‘L’ word. That’s the golden rule of this method. Do not raise their hopes in anyway, you don’t want to leave broken hearts on your trail.I’ll recommend 7 months for this.3 to get to know them and 4 to see if you’re truly in love.Scientists have said that if you still feel the way you do after 4 months,then you’re truly in love. After months and years of doing this, you will surely meet the one. Then it will be time to commit, and you will do it so willingly without feeling trapped. You will know you have sieved through the soil and came out with a diamond.
I love this song by Rascal Flatts
Every long lost dream, led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart
They were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God bless the broken road that led me straight to you
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This is a weekly column that runs every Friday. It is called #opesays. Join me to talk about issues that matter from motivation to love to politics to religion to life itself.